What’s that? You’ve been watching Village of the Angels, the latest episode of Doctor Who Series 13? Oh dear, oh dear. No, don’t look like that — this is very bad news indeed! You should probably stop reading this, but hey, we’re hungry for attention, so don’t turn away just yet. You need to know why you’re in such a calamitous situation.

You see, that which takes the image of an Angel becomes itself an Angel. So your TV? Oh wait, it’s 2021 — I mean, your device. Yes, that. The thing you watched Doctor Who? That could be a portal for a Weeping Angel. Oh dear, oh dear. In fact, you might already have one — right there, in your eye.

This is a most troubling issue, and there’s only one thing for it.

You need to vote in our poll, ranking this episode between one and five out of five.

And now you’ve done that, we want to hear more from you in the comments section. What did you enjoy? Would you like to see more of the Angels? Or are they best used sparingly? Would you like to see more of Annabel Scholey? I know I woul– uh, I mean, yes, she’s been great in Flux, huh?

Ah. Yes, if you’ve done that… Well, you’ll just have to wait for the Angels to take over. Hmm, yes, I might’ve given you the impression that voting and commenting would solve all your ills, but life’s not like. One minute, you’re watching your favourite TV show; the next, you’ve got wings sprouting out of your back.

Do come back sometime… if you manage to escape the Weeping Angels, of course.